Update

I found my paper reinforcers at Staples. They are my go-to place when others fail. They even had different colors so when I get really obsessed I can color code chapters, for instance, by paper reinforcers. LOVE Office supplies!

Old Friend in a New Place

When I was eight years old my parents bought a piano, and I started lessons. I played until eighth grade and then "gave it up" - at least I gave up the formal lessons. I continued to play and would frequently serenade whoever in the house would listen during middle and high school years. When I'd come home from college I would sit down on the bench and pound away at the keys - reteaching myself, it seemed, every time. Although I'm far from being a great piano player, it's always been a source of relaxation and joy.

It was sad when my parents moved from my childhood house 2 1/2 years ago and put the piano in storage. I could no longer wonder into the living room to say "hi" to my old, faithful friend (piano).

But two weeks ago my faithful friend and I were reunited. By the very kind act of my Uncle B. and Aunt S., the piano was transported to our house. Family and a neighbor came and helped us move her in, and it has been a joyful reunion. I forgot how much I like to play...not because I'm good, but because I enjoy music. It can echo any mood you want it to. You just have to find the right piece. (Dri-Do you remember the song "Hymne". You copied it for me years and years ago. I found it the other day - still love it.)

But here's my dilemma...I think the piano needs a name. A good, sturdy name for a friend (piano) that I've had for 20 years. Any ideas?

Finally

It's 3:15am and finally raining. It freaked me out at first because I had forgotten what it sounded like on our chimney when it rains hard.

Toying with Me

I don't think I'd be upset if it ACTUALLY RAINED, but I am rather annoyed with the weather right now. My great state is experiencing drought like conditions. So it's 2:45 and I've been up for an hour because of thunder. (I am not a fan of storms - or being in second stories of houses when storms come in.) But there is NO rain that is accompanying the thunder. There is just the audio reminder that it's out there but not at our house.

The Deacon's Bench

T and I are searching for a church. We haven't been very pro-active, but yesterday we decided to take a trip to a church we've visited before. For the first time we heard the pastors preach (we seemed to have the knack to go during the summer when they are on vacation) and we were impressed. More impressive was what they did afterwards, though. They provided a time they called "The Deacon's Bench" when people (anyone) from the congregation had the opportunity to come up to the front and make comments on what they just heard. It was fascinating. People did not come up and merely say, "Good job, it was interesting". Instead they questioned and asked for more explanation in a particular area, added their own opinions, and even at times doubted what was said. They were critical thinkers and were working together as a congregation. We liked it. Perhaps the search will become a little more pro-active.

Good Bye Olympus D-380

Dear Olympus D-380,

We must part ways. You served your time. I have many great memories preserved on film/computer becuase of you and for that I thank you. But I am moving on. In all honesty, your 2.0 effective megapixels no longer works in today's society, and I upgraded to a Cannon Powershot SD800 IS. Don't worry, though, you were my first digital camera and that guarentees a special place in my heart. Good work. I promise to find a nice spot in recycleland for you.

Your devoted owner,

Metacognitive

Good byes

I had to say goodbye to a dear friend today. Dear friend says it is not necessarily a goodbye, but a "I'll-REALLY-miss-having-you-in-Ohio". Regardless, it is a sad feeling. It got me thinking of all the goodbyes we say in life.

Sometimes they are not all sad. When a sales person leaves my house...good riddance. When a telemarketer hangs up the phone...thank goodness.

But often good byes are hard because we have to say them to the people we love. The time between goodbyes varies. People might see each other the next day, or they may not meet again until the next decade. Many times change often follows goodbyes and that is the most unnerving part. It is not necessarily that the change will be bad, but often we don't know how things will change. We only know that change is inevitable. The combination of change and uncertainty is what pushes us to the boundaries of our comfort zones.

Of course, the hardest goodbye is the one that is permanent. It is an experience that, unfortunately, none of us can avoid during our life time. These goodbyes twist our lives inside out.

And with that thought I came to this realization...I can handle saying "I'll-really-miss-having-you-in-Ohio" goodbyes because it is not permanent. Inevitably there will be some changes...a 1 1/2 hour is more likely to happen spontaneously than a 8 hour drive...but these changes are manageable. Hallelujah for e-mail, cell phones, reliable cars, and cheap airfare.

Father's Day

Happy belated father's day to all dads out there. To my own dad...you're the best.

In honor of Father's Day and Saturday Circle Game that I missed this weekend (because of camping...more on that later), I want to know the best advice your dad has given you. Check the comments for my own dad's words of wisdom.

I am married to the energizer bunny

I get home from an 11 hour day of work and make tacos from an Old El Paso Taco kit. I won't lie, I was pretty proud of myself seeing that I haven't cooked dinner in about 3 weeks. T comes home from a similar day at work. After some chit chat about our days I ask him what he wants to get done tonight. He lists things such as laundry, dishes, setting up our new mailbox, cleaning up the house, and doing garbage. Me? I want to sit on the couch and stare at something. It's now 9:00pm and in addition to the trip to the yummy custard place and the load of laundry I put in, I have sat on my couch and fixed my stare between the TV and my computer. T on the other hand is still outside putting up our new mailbox, probably scouting moles, and hopefully enjoying the great outdoors. The guy never tires. He's amazing.

Happy Mother's Day

To my own Mother - Thank you for all you have done. You are a wonderful mother and friend.

To Mama S - Thanks for being a great MiL and for raising a wonderful son.

To all the other mothers out there that are not my own, but are dear to my heart- I hope you have a wonderful day. You deserve it.

NPR

I have been exploring the AM dial and lower numbers of the FM (Thanks, Brent and M). I have been entertained by the various talk shows, but I am always drawn back to NPR. It's amazing how much smarter I feel just listening to NPR for 5 minutes in my car. Perhaps smarter is not the correct word, perhaps I feel more exposed to my environment ....more cultured...even if it is sometimes related to the absurd. For instance on my 22 minutes drive home from work tonight I learned three interesting things...

1) There is a book on the best seller list called "The Black Swan". I am not sure of the content, but the author is a professor at the school of uncertainty at U Mass. Huh?!?! Seriously, is someone pulling my leg? Did my not-so-good hearing fail me in that moment?

2) The "grime" is a new music scene springing up in England. It's a combination of rap, techno, and dance hall with an English accent.

3) A man in Nevada (Dr. Hope) has been selling plots of the moon for the past 26 years. He has a couple billion to sell and he has sold $9.3 million dollars worth so far. He plans on building an edifice near the Sea of Tranquility that will house the Galactic Government. Awesome. Any takers?

Sadness

I am very saddened by the events that occurred in Blacksburg, VA at Virginia Tech today. My heart goes out to the victims, families, students, and community.
As I walked across my seemingly serene campus today, I tried to picture what it must have been like, but my brain refused to create the scene of something so horrific. I can not imagine the terror. I take for granted my safety when I am walking around the university of which I attend part-time. I think occasionally about my personal safety when walking alone in the parking garage but never in my wildest dreams do I concern myself about my safety when I walk into my classroom. Instead I think of it as an academic haven...a place to share my thoughts with people who are interested in similar topics. That image of the classroom - as a place of comfort, of community, of safety - has been shattered for the students at Virginia Tech. My thoughts will be with them all in the following weeks.

Stoplight

Call me boring, but I love routine. And I am not the best with adjusting to change in my schedule.

For the past 7 months, I could predict which stoplights I would have to stop and at which stoplights I could pass on through without braking on my way to work. It never changed.

Until last week. Early one morning on my way to work, I started slowing down at my first predictable stop, but I was thrown off. The light never changed, I went through, and I was left befuddled. I am sure the driver behind me must have been honking and furious as I slowed down from 50 mph to 15 mph in the face of a green light. But I didn't hear them. My world was thrown off. And it happened again two days later. My morning routine has been altered. No need to worry, though. I will preserver and find new patterns that I can rely on. It's my nature.

Battery Blues

I went to take a picture of my 3 hour old nephew on Monday. The batteries in the camera that I had not picked up for about a month were dead. So in the age of technology, I turned to my trusty back up - my razr cell phone. Of course - batteries were too low to take a cell phone picture. AGH!

Why is it that I feel like I have bought 390,561 AAA batteries and cannot find ANY of them. Anyone have a good method of keeping these necessary but annoying things organized? Will we ever be free of these pesky things?

Nicknames

My mom had five other siblings in her family. One of her siblings produced a boy and four girls all with names starting with "K" (they are my first cousins). I always find it amusing that these four women who are in their mid 30s and 40s are still referred to as "the girls". Even my cute, little cousins who are 7 and 11 year refer to them as "the girls". And if I had to take a wild guess, they will be affectionately known as "the girls" for the rest of their life.

Anyone else have affectionate nicknames for family members?

I *LOVE* Airports

I love airports! They are the best place to people watch. I think the true personality of people appear when they begin to rush, squeeze, and politely step their way into Southwest's "A", "B", and "C" lines. My heart always goes out to the mother and/or father with young children who inevitably end up in the "C" line who are forced to beg and barter so that they don't have to sit seven rows away from their five year old. And I am amazed with the man who, out of hundreds of seats, has to sit right next to me. Does he have no sense of personal space? And my last observation...what crazy restaurant puts raisins in their yogurt parfait. I was so dissapointed...I thought they were blueberries. It was a sad discovery.

Sick

It's been a while since I have been what I consider truly sick. Don't get me wrong, I have had plenty of colds this season...I work in an older, dirty building with teenagers...it's bound to happen. However, I don't consider myself "sick" with a cold (because it happens too often) unless it forces me to the doctors. Today, however, is weird. I am fine except for the fact that I have a little bit of a hacking cough and can't shake a fever for the past 24 hours that is fluttering between 100-101. The worse part is that I am constantly COLD! I just had to take a break from typing to put my hands in my sweater so that I could cuddle up in a ball to keep warm. Perhaps I am not doing the best thing by heating up my body, but I can't help it. I am tired of being cold! Here's to hoping this thing breaks SOON! My wish for the day is to be WARM!

Sadness

My prayers and thoughts are with the Bluffton University and community.

Sensitive

It could be the 13 hour day I just worked (hip hip hooray for parent teacher conferences), but I feel like my emotions are being thrown up and down and side to side today. Happy emotions, sad ones, feelings that spring from fear of change, thoughts that spring from guilt, emotions that emerge from pride in something I have accomplished. Change, good and bad, seems to be swirling around in my world. The change is not necessarily impacting me directly but, rather, indirectly. Guilt, unfortunately, seems to swirl in my world too. Is there anyway for any of us to get rid of that feeling? I know some people that say they regret nothing. I am not there. And I am not sure I wish to be there. For better or worse guilt is sometimes my best motivator and teacher. Fortunately to balance out the moments of uncertainty and insecurity there are moments of pride, happiness, contentment, and satisfaction. For some reason I feel more subjected to all of these emotions today.
Here's to a more stable day tomorrow.

February

February has always been the toughest month for me. The dark effects me; the holiday season is a fond but distant memory; my patience level with students, co-workers, and loved ones decreases. Historically it has been the month that I look for other jobs even though I enjoy my job and feel that it is the career for me right now. So I am overall relieved that March is just a few short days away. I am looking forward to longer days, warmer days, new beginnings, and outdoor activities with loved ones.